The Shooting of Dan McGroo

Richard "Lord" Buckley, 1906-1960

M'Lords and M'Ladies of the Royal Court.  Now, I want to tell you something about a cat by the name of Bobby Service.  He was a wild stud.  Furthermore, he was a Yukonhead, understand and a nugget juggler.  And he loved to swing up there in the icey dicey, you dig?  But he was a cat that wouldn't say no.  He swung up a storm.  And when the Aurora Borealis'd turn on, you know, Ol' Bobby Service'd snap up a couple of them young squaws and vrrrpppppt, make it back to his pad and he'd write all this jazz down, you see.  That's what I say.  Now that's how it came to be history of the thing called "The Wipeout of Swingin' Danny McGroo."  And that's what I want to blow for you cats this evening.

There's a bunch of the studs was a swingin' it up
In the old Red Dog Saloon
And cat that was rockin' the eighty eight
Was blowin' 'How High The Moon'.

And hung back at the bar in a solar game
Stood Swingin' Danny McGroo,
And diggin' his takes was his main day charge
The stallion known as Lou.

When out of the night, which was too far below
And into the jam and stare
They swung a real rough cat so ready from the creeks
Bad hung, swingin' for fair.

Why he looked like a stud with one stomp in the grave
And lacking the push of a mouse,
But he swung up with a poke that was bulgin' fat, no joke
And he wailed out "Juice for the house!"

No cat there could dig the strangers wig
Though we rocked ourselves for a clue
But he swung with his juice
And the last to tilt was Swingin' Danny McGroo

Now they's cats that somehow snap your eye
Hold you right to the bell
And this stud was so hipped he sure looked flipped
Like a cat that had grooved in hell.

The matte most hair and the goofed up stare
Of a dog who's day is done
As he mixed the green stuff in his dipper
And the juice drops fell one by one

I started on figuring on who he was
and wondering what he'd do
And then I nudged my pard 'cause diggin' him hard
was the stallion known as Lou

His eyes went a rubbering around the room
And he looked like a stud in a daze
And his face was real gone but it finally turned on
And the eighty-eight was hit by his gaze

Now the Juicehead Kid was a takin' a jolt
And they's no one making the stool
This real rough cat swung it across the pad
And lit down there real cool

In his beat up shirt that was hung with dirt
He sat and we dug him sway
And we know'd there was a gate at the eighty-eight
And we know'd he'd wail 'till dawn
For I've heard alot of studs stomp out the blues
But this mother was a gasser
He really turned on

Have you ever been completely out of this world
When the lunar came on swift and clear?
And the cool Himalaya's swung you in
With the beat you most could hear,

And the gnasher's mad wail caused you many a take
As you hung out there in the cold
Walking zombie in a knocked-out world
Frantic gassed for that hot green called gold

While up in the blue the Lightman's cue
Called for neon colors and stars
Yeah, I'm hip that you dig with all of your wig
What he blew in just thirty-two bars

Yeah, it was a soul bug, not of the scarfing kind
That could be covered with soup n' greens,
But the beat, black drag of lonely studs,
For the home pad and its groovy scenes,

For the barbecue going and your stallion's love blowing
Four walls and a roof above,
But Man so stashed full of joy, no ship ahoy,
And swinging with your sweet stallion's love

A stallion that's dearer than all this mother world
And solid as heaven is true,
But get this through it all and not diggin' this ball
Was the stallion known as Lou.

And the thought came back of an ancient drag
That stung like a frozen lash,
And the hot lust awoke
To kill! To kill! And the music stopped with a crash,
And the playing cat turned
And his crazy lips burned
And he spoke and his sound was cool.

"I'm hip," said he, "That you don't dig me,
And no stud here cares a damn.
But, I throw this bait and my words are straight
And I'll bet my soul poke they're true.
That one of you mothers is a finger-poppin' square,
And that one is Swinging Danny McGroo"

Well, I ducked my wig and the lights went out.
Two heaters blazed in the dark
And a stallion screamed and the lights went up
And two cats lay stiff and stark.

And dig, there flipped on his wig and all through with his gig
Was Swinging Danny McGroo.
Cat from the creeks was clutched to the breast
Of the stallion known as Lou.

Now these is the simple kicks of the case,
And I guess I ought to know.
Now, they say that the Creek Cat was gassed with the juice.
I wouldn't doubt it, ??? maybe it's so

I ain't so far out as you lawyer touts,
But strictly between us two,
The chick that kissed him and swung with his poke
Was the stallion known as Lou.


From Bad-Rapping of the Marquis de Sade, World Pacific, 1969.

Transcribed by EARL RIVERS

[Text Only Version]

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